Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I Want to Text You Up

On Wednesday, my mom discovered the text message. I’m still not sure if that’s a good thing or not. Since it entered my world sometime in 2005, the text message has had its pros and cons for sure. On the one hand, it’s an easy way to locate lost comrades at crowded concerts, a surefire way to avoid longwinded phone conversations and, most importantly, a digital diary of last night’s drunken debauchery. But, at the same time, when placed in the wrong hands, the text message can be a rather dangerous device---some people will never understand that every thought that crosses their mind doesn’t need to be documented and delivered (don’t worry mom, that thought was directed at JFS not you). Plus, frankly, its kind of weird that my mom is delivering her daily parental reminders through a medium which cut its teeth advancing the booty call into the 21st century. If only Seinfeld was still around to define cell phone edict for my generation.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Jam on the River : All Sorts of Inappropriate Angles

Above: I think this is what it would look like if the Biscuits played the Roman Coliseum

Above: Barber as James Dean (Stellaaaaa)

Above: I think I have seen more Biscuits shows with Eric than any other friend. We once did an interview together on the Bisco Bus. Sammy drank straight from a bottle of Wild Turkey the entire time

Above: The Besack Family is Serious (I mean Sirius) about Jam on the River

Above: Local Band Does O.K.

Above: My Favorite Part of Tour

Friday, May 26, 2006

Egg and Cheese Utopia

One of the benefits of eating the exact same thing every day is that you become something of a food connoisseur, albeit one with a limited range of expertise. Before Relix moved its headquarters uptown, I ate one of Rauel's egg and cheese sandwich every single day. Having now tried almost every egg and cheese Manhattan has to offer south of 14th St., West of Avenue B and east of Hudson St. (a wider sampling than it sounds), I still think its the best New York has to offer. Even though Rauel used the same ingredients as everyone else in the city, he figured out the secret to the perfect egg/cheese combination: cooking his cheese in his egg. Genius! Most people wait until the last minute to place cheese on their egg, resulting in a poorly melted product. Imagine what we could all accomplish if we all worked 11 years without getting a day off like Rauel.…….

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Like, say, alt-rock bands in the late 1990s, it’s increasingly hard to keep track of all the jam & indie bands popping up on the underground rock scene these days. In fact, being a New Yorker with an attentive eye, I’ve found that the easiest way to document a band’s rise is by paying careful attention to the promotional posters plastered to the construction sites I pass on my way to work everyday. As the seasons change, new faces arrive, grow in size and, one Sunday night without explanation, disappear before I digest my Monday morning coffee.
Hopefully, these signs will have a bit longer staying power

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Caity Tour

Caity trying to hide from an impending blog appearance. Either that, or doing the vogue.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006


The Headiest Place on Earth

Monday, May 22, 2006

A Visit to the BK

Seeing a concert in Brooklyn while the National is playing Manhattan is kind of like visiting Buckingham Palace when the Queen is away on summer holiday.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Phishin' for Music

In high school, one of my favorite pastimes was wandering aimlessly around my town's record store. I made lists of CDs I hoped to purchase, studied jewel cases that caught my eye, and figured out all sorts of new ways to piece my body by conversing with the store’s cashiers. Since the rise of the mp3, however, CD shopping has become a distant memory, a fading friend I no longer visit. But, before Dark Star Orchestra, I had some time to kill so I ventured across Times Square to visit the Virgin Mega Store. They'd already sold out of this month's Relix, but still had plenty of Phish in stock (go figure). Junta was actually stuck behind Round Room and Undermind, so I took it upon myself to reorganize the Phish section. Maybe some budding stoner will wander by and kick-start his collection, the right way. As for my personal Phish collection, It kind of grew like this:

A Live One (a gift from mom and dad for Chanukah)

Junta (purchased two days latter when I realized A Live One didn’t contain “Fee)

Hoist (I still hope to place “If I Could” on my wedding mix)

Lawn Boy, A Picture of Nectar and Rift (I joined once of those CD club to buy these simultaneously…kind of like Damn Yankees for music-dorks)

Billy Breaths (I had no idea what happened to Phish; now it’s my favorite album)

Story of the Ghost (I ran out of school during third period to buy it and spent all sixth period obsessing over it; I don’t think its hit my player this millennium)

Farmhouse (the first time I heard Sam Goody spin Phish through its PA)

Round Room (I heard it as the MP3s leaked to the web before I purchased the album)

Undermind (We got an advance at Relix; It was dark, dangerous and the beginning of the end).

Thursday, May 18, 2006

It's A Small World After All

As a child, my parents encouraged me to ride It's a Small World whenever we visited Disney World. Its message seemed good-natured enough: despite our cultural differences, we are all just a bunch of Mattel manikins singing the same catchy song (which is conveniently
available for $12.99 at the end of the ride).

Years later, I its think its message still holds true. Maybe it’s because I've never lived outside New York for more than a summer tour, but the more people I meet, the more everyone seems the same. It’s a comforting feeling, though, to know that we're all in it together, though no one seems able to point-point exactly what it is exactly

Anyways, here are some random, small world reflections from the past week:

There are two tyes of New Yokers. Those who wait patiently for the subway to come and those who impatietly pull their necks trying to see its headlights in the distance. I definately fall into the latter catagory.
As I child, Planet Hollywood and its musical cousain, the Hard Rock Cafe, were destinations, reasons to venture into the city. Now, they are reasons to avoid human congestions on the sidewalk. Perhaps oneday my original copies of Relix will make it onto the wall---in the kosher section of course.

Most companies only encourage drunken interaction among co-workers on holidays like Christmas. At Relix, we encourage drunken interaction among co-workers on holidays like Tuesday. I took this picture at our Green Apple post-party last week. Since entering the Relix world is kind of like being inducted into a fraternity, we feel the need to assign everyone little nick names upon entry. Behind her back, I've started calling Jenny, the newest member of our dysfunctional family, Heady Jenny. She's really not that heady and it says more about how far Relix has drifted from its original hippie-rock tag, but it has a nice ring to it anyway. Heady days indeed.

I've discovered that the mozerilla and tomatto sandwhich is essentially pizza for adults I bumped into Ian at Sarah's graduation party Saturday. I'm not sure how I met Ian, but he seems to be friends with everyone I know and apparently reads my blog. At 1 Am, while trying to explain the difference between a goy and a shikza to some girl (see below ) Ian wandered into this party and I decided to document our encounter. So here is Ian trying, unsuccessfully, to hide from my blog.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Lunch Break

Sometimes---just somtimes---I love my job. I got to see Ambulance LTD in studio today. Amazing show, bad photo.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Earplug Alert!

Once again too many shows, too little time. In an ideal world we’d meet up a lot this week

5/18: New Riders of the Purple Sage @ Canal Room

5/19: Tom Verlaine @ Bowery Ballroom

5/20: Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings, Antibalas @ Irving Plaza

5/21: The National @ Webster Hall

5/22: Gov’t Mule @ Bowery Ballroom

It’s All in the Wording

Someone pointed this out to me recently: the main difference between being a “goy” and a “shikza” is that hooking up with a “shikza” has a mysterious “appeal” while marrying a “goy” is a surefire way to be written out of a Jewish will. Either way, I think I'll stick to what I know---or at least who I know will drive me slightly insane for many Rosh Hashanahs to come.


6/13 is shaping up to be the new 4/20. In addition to packing for Bonnaroo, there are now four equally cool New York shows to choose from on a single day:

Widespread Panic @ Irving Plaza
Radiohead @ Theater at MSG
moe. @ Central Park
MMW @ Capitale (extra heady benefit as part of the Marijuana Policy Project's annual gala)

Since I don't smoke pot MMW is out and since I haven't recently had my heart slashed into a million pieces I can live without Radiohead. I'll try to get into Widespread Panic, but still feel kind of like a carpet bagger. So, I guess it's moe. for me, which works out just fine since the group's last Central Park show is still one of my favorite memories from 2001 (by the way, I lost my friend Tim at that show and still haven't found him...I guess he was swallowed by a moe.ron)

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Happy Mothers Day

Above: Mommy and me. Neither of us has aged a day since 1987!

Of all the Hallmark Holidays out there, Mothers Day is the most genuine or, at least, most justified. My mom is the best: she corrects my typos, mixes my chocolate milk and takes it as a sign or endearment---I hope---when I say I aspire to marry a neurotic Jewish woman from Westchester. When I was a baby, my mother used to lull me to bed with folk anthems by Peter, Paul and Mary and Joni Mitchell. I may not have learned how to tie my shoes or properly part my my hair, but I certainly remember those lyrics she used to sing. In fact, I think I subconsciously plagiarize them on a daily basis...

The Circle Game:

Yesterday, a child came out to wander
Caught a dragonfly inside a jar
Fearful when the sky was full of thunder
And tearful at the falling of a star

And the seasons they go 'round and 'round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Then, the child moved ten times 'round the seasons
Skated over ten clear frozen streams
Words like, "When you're older", must appease him
And promises of someday make his dreams

And the seasons they go 'round and 'round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came,
and go round and round and round
In the circle game

Sixteen springs and sixteen summers gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels through the town
And they tell him, "Take your time. It won't be long now.
'Til your drag your feet to slow the circles down"

And the seasons they go 'round and 'round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty
Though his dreams have lost some grandeur coming true
There'll be new dreams, maybe better dreams and plenty
Before the last revolving year is through.

And the seasons they go 'round and 'round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and 'round and 'round
In the circle game
And go 'round and 'round and 'round in the circle game.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Hello Old Friend

I should probably try sleeping at night....

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Earplug Alert!

Some fine shows this week. Not sure how many I will make, between Dad's birthday tour and Sarah's graduation tour, but that shouldn't stop any of you (except maybe Dad and Sarah) from hitting up any of these show. I strongly urge each and everyone of you to see American Babies Thursday. It'’s Tom Hamilton's new band, featuring the below mentioned Russo on drums. Simply put, the best new music I've heard this year. Stop reading and go see it now (come on, you know how these blog entries end anyway, blah blah blah Phish tour, blah blah blah crazy girl tour, blah blah blah blah life lesson tour)

5/10: Phoenix @ Bowery Ballroom

5/11: American Babies @ Knitting Factory

5/12-13: Dark Star Orchestra @ Nokia

5/14: Rana, Apollo Sunshine and the Brakes @ Knitting Factory

PS whose coming with me Thursday>?

The Birth of a Hangover

Even though I took them off my list of favorite bands sometime during the 1990s, the Counting Crowes still penned my favorite line in rock-and-roll history: “She Knows she is more than a little misunderstood, she has trouble acting normal when she’s nervous.” I think it captures an important element of the human condition, or at least, of my condition. A friend once told me that I fall “somewhere between the guy who gets the girl and the guy who is afraid to ask depending on my mood.” She’s right. I know I’m more than a little understood, I have trouble acting normal when I’m nervous.

So why do I bring up a drunken Saturday night from November 2004 up on this drunken Monday evening in 2006? Well, it’s because Elliot Smith owns my second favorite line in rock-and-roll history: “A Happy Day and then you pay/Feel like Shit the Morning After.” Nursing an impending hangover on my sofa tonight, Smith’s words have never sounded truer

I had a good day. I wrote some cool news items (Jam Cruise!, Derek and Eric!) uploaded a new CD (Say Hi To Your Mom) and managed to solve a rather difficult math equation (3/4th of Ambulance LTD + ½ of the Benevento/Russo Duo= 1 Happy Mike Greenhaus). Fine, I’ll give her credit: the JFS variable---lets call her XY to the indie-rock degree---is also in the positive denominator.

It was the type of day when the rock-and-roll deities shined down on me. Who else would think to place Joe Russo on a bill with members of Ambulance LTD. But, somehow, I found myself at Sin-e tonight, sipping draft beer and watching Joe Russo and Matt from RANA open for the remaining members of Ambulance LTD. It’s odd that I’ll be seeing Russo in an amphitheater before my 25th birthday, but I still find it fascinating that I’ve been able to see his progression from Fat Mama to Phish in just a few shorts years.

And, as my head begins to beat, and tomorrow I know I will pay, today I had a happy day.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

1/9: Transfer is Available to...A Trial Seperation

The 1/9: Some marriages were never meant to last.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

I Feel the Feeling I Forgot

I hadn’t pressed refresh that many times since Phish announced its final tour date. In fact, I think I forgot the feeling entirely: the excitement of piecing together an entire summer simply through rumors, the anticipation of waiting for a webpage to solidify those rumors into an official announcement, the fear that other “trivial” plans would conflict with that tour.

It’s always a great time of the year, tour announcement day. Friends emerge from the woodwork, AIM windows flicker at epileptic speed and the giddy, adolescent bounce I all too often suppress launches into full Greenhaus effect (sorry for the poor pun, I seriously haven’t slept since 1997). If you’re compulsive like me, you reach the point where you’ve pressed refresh so many times you start to notice the little details on a webpage slowly changing, sculpting.

And then, when you least expect it, you click refresh one final time and the rollercoaster begins. The dates are in, the message boards are alive, Phish is reuniting---kind of---backed by the Benevento/Russo Duo. Random thoughts run through my brain: I could take a day off from work here, make a long weekend there; fly home from California through Hartford to catch an extra show, run out of a friend’s wedding early to make it to Bethel by set time. Within seconds, three weeks of my life took shape.

For about ten minutes nothing else seemed to mater: not the overdue article sitting idly my screen, not the companionship of a new female friend and certainly not the half-empty glass of chocolate milk on my desk. I called Benjy, assuming he too had already sublet his house for the summer, posted a news bit on Relix and, actually, MapQuested the possibility of making it to Bethel, NY without missing a beat (ya know Eve and Evan would understand)

But, then, something really odd happened. Instead of lying awake all night, plotting my summer journey, my mind began to drift and an odd emotional reality set in. I began to think about life’s other obstacles, as well as its gifts. I didn’t want to rearrange my entire summer, to skip out on my other plans. In fact, it had already been a pretty darn good day in the life of Mikey Greenhaus. I had lunch with an old friend, walked across the Brooklyn Bridge, and geeked out about Garden State.

When former classmates ask me what I’ve been up to since college, my stock response is that I segued from Skidmore to Phish tour to crazy neurotic Jewish girl tour to, finally, work tour. It’s a pretty natural progression, I guess. In general, I’m the type of person who needs something to obsess about, to be excited about . Otherwise, my mind begins to wander. I think Phish was the training wheels for that style of aggressive procrastination.

Oddly enough, jam-nation is the one place my latent Westchester cutthroat ambition shows its ugly I-Banker head. I’ve never been good at working my way up the corporate ladder, but I’m always able to get tickets in time, to organize an expedition onto the floor.

About a month after Phish parted ways, I took a girl to see Trey perform with the Vermont Youth Symphony. I consider it one of the defining moments in my concert going career (and no I did not get laid that night. Alas!). Trey played “Flock of Words,”I looked left and sadly smiled. An odd-pressure had been lifted, the fear that I’d miss the show, the night they broke-out the song. But, at the same time, other bands, other people, would still make me feel the same way. Happy.

See you all at Jones Beach on July 7.

I'm floating in the Blympalot
I feel the feeling I forgot
Swimming weightless in the womb
Bouncing gently round the room
In a minute I'll be free
And we'll be splashing in the sea

I feel no curiosity
I see the path ahead of me
In a minute I'll be free
And we'll be splashing in the sea
We hear a tiny cry
As the ship goes sliding by
-Phish, 1995

Monday, May 01, 2006

The Hiatus is Over

After a six-month hiatus, I finally relaunched my Greenhaus Effect Column just before a Jammys. I guess I should feel embarrassed about the six-month lag, but, then again, every good jam-scene denizen deserves a good hiatus. For those of you who stumbled upon this page post-hiatus, my column is kind of like my blog only instead of using my weekend activities as fodder for self-depreciation, I use my drunken exploits as fodder for self-examination. Enjoy